Clean Slate

Gautam was strolling alone in garden. It had just finished raining. So the ground was wet and breeze was pleasant. As a wave of that pleasant breeze passed, it unsettled the rain droplets settled on leafs. Most fell on the ground but many found their abode on Gautam’s face, shoulders and hair. He enjoyed it. He also said a quiet inner thanks to the creation for providing such an unbelievable lovely magic. Water, coming down from the sky! It made everything on the earth look bright, fresh and revitalized. Trees, grass, plants looked greener and flowers brighter. The air seemed clearer; to look through and to breathe in. It contained no dust. But yes it had the unmistakable smell of water meeting the earth. What do we call it? Yes, petrichor! Birds chirped and bees buzzed around. Another strong wave of breeze passed and some leafs took their last part of journey. They fell on him like showering of flower petals. He smiled and thanked the creation once again. He felt as though he was being honored by showering of leafs on him by an unknown entity. He felt that someone pre-planned it, that the shower will occur just when he is just under the tree… it had happened earlier too.

Wave of a thought entered in his mind. It was about a person, who had been very fond of him and of course the feelings were reciprocated by him. The thought played around in his mind. Gautam also played with it. Hundreds of related memories covered his mental space with a quick shower. He looked up at the sky. A cloud was passing by. He smiled and allowed the memory to pass by too. His mind was clean once again.

Yet another cloud appeared over him. It was the cloud of the work he did. He remembered the last time he got an untimely call from the office, he was worried. What now? He had wondered. What might have happened? So many worrying thoughts had darkened his mental horizon. Same phenomenon had been happening in current monsoon. A thick cloud cover darkens the horizon; but it hardly rains. He found a simile in it. He had allowed that call to make a darkening thought inside him. When you know the source of a problem, it vanishes and it did.

His mental sheet was spotlessly clear once again. He felt fresh and energetic; not really to break into a run; but into a smile with abandon.

Imaginary us

I finished my arguments silently

She had heard me patiently

Then she looked hard at my face

Lowered her eyes and slowly… turned away

She walked a few steps towards the setting sun

The Sun turned her face red

Was it angry red?

Or hopeless red

She stopped after a few steps

Sun sank a little lower

Her lengthening shadow was crawling towards me

Then as if it waited

Soon sun lowered even more

Her shadow was at my feet now

Gradually it started climbing on me

That made me rather uneasy

I turned away from it

I saw my own shadow going away from me

Her shadow was missing here

It was on me, on myself

That froze me

Soon both shadows started getting weaker

Thankfully

I turned back and saw red rim of sun

I turned again towards my shadow

My shadow was merging in the darkness

Dissolving on the ground

Losing its definition, edges

I waited till it was all dark

My body also had no shadow

I looked to find the rim of the sun

But couldn’t…

Shockingly

The space between me and the sun

… Was blank

World and her story

Time is passing

So is life

Cross roads, hairpin bends,

Steep climbs, landmarks

All falling behind

I can see a path winding away

Far in the distance

Dissolving into nothingness

One end of which is under my feet

The other seems to be

At the end of my vision

After that… nothing

After that… nothing,

Would be wrong to say

After all, the rest of the world

Has to be there

Somewhere,

Beyond the end of the path

Beyond the end of my vision

Yes, the world made by man

Will cease to exist

But world untouched by man

Will still be there

In its full glory

Narrating it’s amazing story.

I will pass away

You too will be gone

Our sorrows would be wiped off

Smiles will fade leaving no mark

Storytellers will not be around

Listeners also would have passed

But the world will go on

Narrating her story on her own.

Alexander, Babar, Genghis Khan

Christ, Kabir and Krshn

Winners and vanquished

Killers and the killed

All dumped randomly

Unceremoniously

In the dark silence

Of a little old box

Not moving

Not speaking

Yet wearing the crown

With a bloody sword in hand

Not knowing their story is done.

Wait for Bliss

Somewhere in the distance, far away

When the day reaches its zenith

And the evening arrives quietly

Like a shy hesitant bride

Lighting lamps of my memories

When memories make my breath heavy

And well my eyes up for no visible reason

The love reaches out to soothe the tension

I know it’s you who touched me

Dusky bride facing me

Some hearts remain distant forever

And some for eternity, belong together

My own mind becomes my enemy

When it offers to suffer

Even your pains inside me

When I find myself in such complexities

I light a lamp of your memories

In my heart I know

My heart’s deepest secrets

Secrets to my everlasting dreams

I exist due to those sun-gold dreams

If only a shadow of my dream escaped

My heart might feel dead to its beats

When the day ends

And sun takes the light away

Along with reason for dreamy shadows

The evening turns into a bride

Covered in a dark cloak

And arrives by my side

Quietly

Whose dream is it any way?

Oh, how come you are here?
Huh! Why is it so dark
And at this odd time?
What! I called you?
But I don’t think so.
Really?
Let me try and remember
Could you please just help me
When was that
I mean when, did I call you
At night! This last night! Shocking
So… did I call you on your cell
No no, I am not smiling
Then how?
You just heard me calling
Oh my dear, I am sure you were dreaming
He he, finally
Someone is dreaming of me
And has reached the point
Where I wanted her to be for a long time
Nice for me, ehh
Let’s go to CCD and celebrate with Cappuccino…
Where are you?
OMG! Not again
Thank god, you are not here,
Thank god, no one is here
To find me behaving so utterly silly
For the nth time
It was not about her dream
But mine

Ringing Ears

It is dark. So very dark. Also I can’t hear a thing. Where is everyone gone? They all were here few minutes back. I have lost gauge of time. I don’t how much time has passed. May be they all are meeting in the passage outside. May be they have gone to the canteen. It must be so boring to sit with me. There was no sound of any kind. The silence was perfectly deafening. Suddenly I heard a sound. Note of a straight single frequency. I am used to it. I have been hearing them all my life, since my childhood. Whenever there was total silence, my inner ears would start resonating in various frequencies and that sound would go on getting louder or weaker. It sustained itself as long as there is no external interference. So, there is this single frequency note ringing in my ear.

What is happening? Finally I decided to check it out myself. Very gingerly I put my feet on the ground, put my palms on my knees and got ready to stand up. I extended my arms in front to feel anything, a wall, a curtain, a person… my finger tips did not touch anything. I swayed my arms sideways – nothing. Then swayed them all around me with same result. I hope they all are fine. I had to stand up now. I did that very carefully. I was standing. I bent forward and extended my arms. It was surprising. I thought I should be touching something. I took two steps forward but felt unconfident. So I returned two steps back and found my bed. Now in desperation I decided to risk it all and go forward till I found someone.

I moved with resolve and kept going. I had decided that even if I don’t find my bed again, it is fine. Even if I cannot find anyone, may be someone else will find me… And then, I felt a wall made of soft cotton, or more like a cloud. Cloud! What the hell! How come there is a cloud in here or even cotton? Strangely I went through it. But why is it so dark? I tried to find a light, any light close by or in the distance. Nothing. Where am I? Am I on a high mountain at night? I was frightened now, very frightened. As I had felt earlier that I walked through a wall of clouds; I felt something passed through me too. After this I went through another smaller cloud and freaked out. I felt the floor had vanished from under my feet, literally. In a hurry I turned back, retraced my steps and I thought I reached where I was supposed to be.

I did not find my bed this time. But I did hear that frequency again. Thankfully, I was back in my own space. I felt someone walk towards me. Then many more steps came closer. None of them were looking at me but looking in the same direction above me. I remember there was monitor that side. They were all watching a straight line in the middle of the screen. That line perhaps was the origin of that single frequency ringing in my ears.

Then there was a click that ended the sound of that frequency. My ears were not ringing any more.