Gautam thinks something is different since morning. He is mentally checking for the changes around his chest, but inside. And also a little higher around his head, around brain, he wondered. What must be happening around these two areas? Brain is an organ, he mentally argued; but mind is not. It is a soft-ware issue. Here he hit a wall called, ‘loss of clarity’. He was still in his hut and these strange blissful feelings had filled inside him in the hut.
He decided, no, nothing has changed in the outside world, but in him… inside him.
All those regular ideas, thoughts, disturbances… that stayed in his mind and played games in the brain, had disappeared… or so it seems. Gone away for a short while? This could be temporary. But how was Gautam to know that? All kinds of regular clutter, idle chatter, repeats, anxieties and distresses seem to have vanished. His mental space seemed to be glittering and spotlessly clean. His mind was feeling light, as if ready to fly. Brain seems to be idling quietly. Not revved up like it did, till yesterday.
Gautam found himself to be very unusually calm. He had woken up after an amazingly peaceful sleep. He felt no sign of laziness. He had never experienced this state of his mind; where he is not happy; but is blissful. His face has no smile, but his being seems to have blossomed. How a bloomed flower doesn’t smile; but its entire body seems to be smiling.
Something like that was happening to him. He stepped out of his hut. Many leafs fell on him. Whenever that happens, he always looks up and thanks the tree. A little ahead the yellow flower tree had shed numerous flowers. May be it happens every day; but Gautam felt that day it was done especially and purposefully for him. Birds in the sky seemed more noisy, perky and cheerful. The deer, rabbits and foxes had made a group and were huddled together. Small birds were perched on the lowest branches of the trees and seemed to be watching Gautam walk past.
He felt a strange lightness in his feet, in his walk. His body did not seem to exert to move ahead… very unusual. This can’t be heaven… He clearly remembers he hadn’t died… at least not as yet.